Mountains keep calling me

I made plans last year on top of which mountains I want to stand this year, but achieving this seems to be far from easy. Either I work either the weather is bad, the other day I injured my foot, several days it was too hot. Besides I am not as fit as I planned to be. Dreaming a lot but achieving too little. Though, most of all I am really tired of the work I did during winter and spring. Days and days of study are taking their toll now, as all I want to do is rest just a little bit longer.

But, when I am finally up there, I am extremely happy. :) So, why wait, right?

To have what we wish for

Con el tiempo supo, además, que había muchas personas que tenían menos de lo que querían y podían cuidar.

Laura y el corazon de las cosas by Lorenzo Silva

I started to learn Spanish language quite some time ago but my progress is very slow. Mostly because I am lazy. I should put more effort into learning, I know. The procrastination doesn’t take me very far and it never will.

Yesterday Ž and I took a short walk along the Ljubljanica river. Celebrating our 11^th anniversary of being together and the promise of a bad weather today brought us to the river banks in the old part of the city. We also spotted a very rare Bahama’s duck there, that had most probably escaped from someone’s pond. I suggested that we have a cup of coffee to round our “trip”, so we stopped in the nearest café, called Krakovc (named after a district called Krakovo). A lovely place, though empty at that time, Spanish music, tapas and Spanish beers. I was surprised, really, as the name of the café would suggest the local offer. Later I heard the waitress speaking Spanish on the phone so I asked her where she came from. Argentina, was her answer, so I had a short chat with her. I could see that her face brightened and a smile showed on her face. I am sure that I made her day. And for sure she made mine a little bit happier. Besides, I have another story to tell. But most of all, I promised myself to take Spanish language a little bit more serious, it won't do me any harm if I try harder. Because then I will have a little bit more of that what I wish to have. 

Dear Scots,

I was sorry to hear that you decided against the independence of Scotland. Money rules and pensioners make decisions, and maybe they won’t be even here tomorrow! Your time has obvisously not come yet…

I know a huge courage is needed for changes in life.

You would be mine

In March I met a man who is a descendant of one of the famous aristocratic, blue blooded families. He gave me his book about the Slovenian mythology as a present. It’s an interesting read but it takes a lot of time to go through the small letters and absorb so much information.

I met this man once again about a week ago. He brought me a crate of beer which he brews, and he said to me, looking frankly into my eyes: “If you didn’t have a boyfriend, you would be mine.” Without any doubt the domineering blood of his ancestors runs through his veins! And what I find it very interesting is this that the Universe keeps sending me men who are Lions, or their Ascendants are in the Lion, all the time (well, Ž is an exception). I just wonder why. Would the Lion be a perfect match for me or just another difficult trial in my life?

Summer dress

I was surprised about two weeks ago when I found a leaflet stuck behind my windshield wiper. I thought that one of my neighbours had left me a message but it was far from that. It almost read like an improper invitation, with a phone number and a request to call that person. I wrote him a kind text message to tell me who he was. After a while I received a reply which read: 178/76, brown hair, blue eyes, 3X years old, from Ljubljana. Right, I was curious, who was on the other side, so I called him. He was very embarrassed and explained me why he had written such message. So we met the next day.

Believe me that I was unpleasantly surprised when that man appeared in front of me. Is it so difficult to tell that you are 168 cm tall or even less? Is it so difficult to tell that you are bald and that the rest of your hair is gray and black, and that your eyes are gray? Is it so difficult to admit that you are only living in Ljubljana but actually you drive home almost every weekend and your mama is still doing your laundry? I don’t like people who are telling lies to achieve their goal.

At the end of our meeting he said to me: “It was so wonderful to talk to you, I could talk to you for days!” Maybe, my dear man, but I want to tell my stories, too… He fell for me big time, but sorry man, we are worlds apart.

Ž knows about all this. I wondered why the Universe had sent me this man. Maybe to show me how precious this, what I have, is?

So, you see, what wearing a simple summer dress while you go shopping can cause…

Mayor’s fairy

I have spotted her for the second year now, sitting high above our heads in front of the town hall. Last year so many children were waiting in a line that I didn’t come close to her, this year I stepped in front of her, waited that her magic wand touched my head and made a wish.

Maybe it was a magical evening, I don’t know, because I also got a free hug from one of the English speaking girls waiting to share them at a Triple bridge (I just love this idea of free hugs), I received free lens at the optics, helped a couple to get one package of hot chocolate for free and listened to the rappers singing on a stage about the good times that are about to come. Could I ask for more?

I wish you many magical days like mine was, and most of all that life treats you well in the coming days.

Experimenting

I heard too many times in the past few months that I am soooo happy having all the time for myself. Obviously all those people who said that don’t have any idea how it is to live with a thought how to find a way to be financially independent and not to rely on generosity of my parents and partner so that I will be able to buy myself another pair of socks or something else of my desire also tomorrow, not just today. I keep telling to these people that they can be as happy as I am if they quit their job. Of course, nobody is very enthusiastic about this thought.

On the other hand, if I ignore my future, this time that I have is very precious. I am fully aware of this. Beside making lace, I’ve been also experimenting in my kitchen. Not much, just a little. The only imperfection about this is that usually I forget to take photos of the final result of my experiments.

One day I made pita bread. At least the recipe said that it was pita bread. I wondered if my dough discs would indeed rise while being in hot oven; and they really did. Now I know that it is best to eat them still warm or at least the same day, stuffed with a filling of your choice.

I also baked some cookies but I gave them away to my parents and friends, not even thinking of taking any photos of them (cookies, not parents or friends). One recipe will find its page in my recipe book and I will test a couple of other recipes in the next days. It is so hard to belive that it is almost Christmas.

Wild & free

I haven’t forgotten how to be a rebel but I have obviously forgotten the good feeling the rebelling brings along.

One afternoon, part 2

I wanted to write about this yesterday but deleted the text I wrote. Today I won't be quiet because people have to be aware that under the reign of Ljubljana's former mayor (and he will be probably the future one, too) lots of cultural heritage was destroyed. Especially the Roman and medieval remains, as well as a part of 4500 years old remains of the first settlement in Ljubljana.

I keep fingers crossed that the ministry will be able to protect what remained. We don't need more underground parking places in the city center, just a few people will earn lots of money again. But inhabitants of Ljubljana are blindfolded and (will be) guided by a man who hides his real motives (yes, money rules this world) behind a huge smile. It really a pity that people don't care.

Here are a few more photos from my Saturday walk (a woman with a huge camera took a photo of me while I was crossing that bridge; I just wonder where this photo will be published):

This house was built after an earthquake in 1895:

Almost all buildings in that street were torn down because it was not safe anymore to live in them, and the street got straight (it was curbed before). I have no idea what kind of meaning this sign has: or why these heads are above the door (who they present?): Ljubljana's castle from the Shoemakers' bridge:

Perhaps these shoes hanging above the street are connected with the name of the bridge, I haven't found this out.

Ljubljana is full of secrets. Hopefully I will be able to show you more soon ... before they are destroyed by the greedy man.

This crossed my mind today

Random thoughts:

- last Friday a friend asked me where my colleague is getting his life's energy from. She received an answer when she saw him surrounded by his five kids and wife. Last year at the same occasion I was watching his pregnant wife surrounded by her four children. They were like little angels guarding their pregnant mother. It is hard to accept that I will never be a Mama but eventually I will have to get over this.

- I dreamed about the dolphins two days ago. I hope this dream has a good meaning.

- yesterday I saw the Long-eared Owl flying over our garden again. Hopefully we will have young owls in the neighborhood in spring. I will check this in May when youngsters squeak each night, pleading for food.

- it is interesting to read old newspapers. Today I will check some articles about the International Women's Day in 1911 and Slovenia's first independence in 1918 (women helped a lot that this happened).

So, enjoy "your" day if you are a woman!

Modern times

When I was driving back home yesterday in the late afternoon, I was sitting in a coupe with three girls. The train was full of students and pupils going back to Ljubljana. One of the girls was looking into the screen of her laptop, the other two had fingers "glued" on their mobile phones. They haven't looked up for three hours. I was the only one staring through the window. I might be old fashioned but I have no wish to be addicted to any of such modern gadgets. I can easily leave my mobile phone at home, and I wouldn't miss my computer very long. I would probably just miss the Internet with all the information and knowledge available there.

I was away again this weekend. I've joined a group in which we learn to recognize different kinds of bird song, that's why we spend lots of time outside. It is true that I would prefer to stay at home sometimes but some events just never happen again. Besides, more people see/hear more. It is not very common to see a Lesser Spotted Woodpecker, though we spotted one yesterday at the tripoint of Slovenia, Austria and Hungary. An educational path leads through the forest and it is well equipped. We just didn't have time to read everything that was written on the boards.

Now, when I am back home it is time to check what kind of seeds we would need for this season, and of course, it is also time to tidy my home. Home, sweet home.

Day after day

To make the long stories short:

- mmm, I like this wonderful warm weather. I can wear less clothes and I can stand behind a telescope much longer.

- looking through the telescope sooner in the evening I could see Mercury in the western sky (if you want to see it - it is visible with a naked eye just after sunset). At the same time huge and bright Mars was rising on the East. The visibility was excellent, I could see Jupiter's four moons lined in a straight line, the fifth one was this time a bit farther away. I could also see the strips on the planet. Now I still have to spot Saturn with its rings.

- Pikec the cat wants to cuddle all the time. So, I spend lots of time cuddling him.

- finally I finished another piece of lace. Actually I was cheating a bit but I couldn't wait to put another pattern on the pillow. I studied one of my books on lace making how to make one of the corners. I hope it won't be too difficult when I come to that part of the pattern.

- I became restless when I came across this post. I know I have to go across the sea once again. The huge wide world gives me another perspective, the new and positive attitude towards everyday life. It becomes boring after years of staying home, seeing people who all look the same, who think the same. Though, I would need some courage for a trip like this because Ž doesn't want to come along. But it is very boring to travel alone under such big American skies. I know because I was there (oh, so many years ago!).

- writing about the travel - my neighbors are away this week. In the meantime I take care of their cat and empty their mailboxes. It became a tradition. Some went skiing and the others traveled all the way to Sri Lanka. They know what's good for the soul. Though, my colleague at work came home from India with a typhus some weeks ago. Scary.

- I was standing in a garden together with Ž yesterday in the afternoon. It is time to make plans. Well, not only plans. We will have to take garden spades into our hands too. It is time to plant onion and garlic before it gets too warm. Although I think we are not finished with winter weather yet and the floods usually don't come sooner than late March or April.

- later in the evening we caught a man walking across the meadows in a nature reserve although this is forbidden. People just don't care. They want to shoot another commercial there. It is hard to believe how much time and money they spend for this.

- coming back home and admiring the planets from our yard a Long-eared Owl flew over our heads. Without any sound. At the reserve I could hear a Yellowhammer singing for the first time this year and most Hen Harriers are obviously on their way to the breeding grounds in the North because we could spot only one female in their usual roosting place.

Oh, spring, spring is on its way!

By train

I admire graffiti. They are a piece of art. Not long ago I saw a public notice that graffiti are welcome on some walls in Ljubljana. Those walls were to my surprise specifically listed. I think that those who draw graffiti prefer trains to walls because more people can see them. These are from my latest visit of Ljubljana's railway station:

Oh yes, I was away again this weekend. Journey by train is pleasant for me as long as I am alone in the compartment. This time I was.I would still prefer to travel by car but petrol has become so expensive in Slovenia that I can hardly afford any longer trips at all. If things in my country will go on like this one will be able to see only big cars in the streets because only rich people will be able to afford to buy petrol. Where is this greediness leading us to?

In bloom

Our Christmas wheat has been growing very quickly and we will have a nice green "grass" in our home just on time. I also spotted small white flowers on my cactus. I used to collect them but spiky as they are and with special needs I decided to keep just one of them. It usually blooms all winter instead of having a little rest after the summer heat. My mom used to get plants for her birthday each year because everyone thought that this would be the best gift for her. At the end she didn't know where to put them all. This is how it goes with the gifts, doesn't it, we get what we don't need and sometimes we give what people don't need.

It has become crowded in the shops these days. I thought of buying myself a skirt but came home disappointed. Are we not women anymore that all we can buy are trousers? I hope that fashion trends will change because I am fed up seeing only those tight "carrot" trousers everywhere for the third year in a row. Why can't fashion designers realize that not all women have perfect legs? Oh, fashion, how much more boring can you be?

Shopping

I like strolling through the city center at night, it is so peaceful there. I like stopping by the windows of the shops and sometimes wonder at the imagination of those who decorate them. It is tempting to buy things that I see but at that time shops are already closed. Besides, what would I do with so many things that I don't need?I watched a video of Chinese toy factories the other day, people working night and day for a salary that can hardly cover their cost of living. I stopped buying Chinese food long time ago. I think I don't need to explain why. Last year I almost didn't eat any garlic because everywhere only the Chinese one was sold. This year I planted my own. I found out that Chinese peanuts have been sold lately in our shops. Its price is almost the same as for the one produced in the USA. I always wonder what we really eat these days. Have you ever asked yourself why children have so many allergies today? Is it food, air or something else?

I won't wrap many presents this year. It is more important that we get together on Christmas evening than to open many presents. We have almost anything we wish to have these days. It is not like it used to be when oranges at Christmas were a treat (we had to drive over the border to buy them).

I like this time of year although it is crowded everywhere. It is St. Lucy's day today. I won't bake Lussekatter but I will plant the seeds of wheat. To make these days a little bit more festive than they already are.

A helping hand

It seems that in a world as we have it we need more and more people who are aware that we are destroying other living beings because of our own comfort and greed. What I experienced this Saturday was a destruction of trees because of a flower. So it goes these days, this is what we do. And I was there as a helping hand. We were creating a habitat for a rare orchid (I don't have its picture, these two on the photos are from the mountain areas). Owners of that land don't cut grass anymore because they don't have any benefit from that, so a meadow is slowly becoming a forest. It would be nothing wrong with that if someone didn't find the rare orchid there.

When we finished our work I asked people if they gave any offering to dwarfs who lived in those trees or at least said thank you but they stared at me numb and with open mouths. I might be weird but I do believe in what my ancestors believed in.

Sometimes I wonder why we do all this. Is it really worth it? Yesterday I spoke with Ž about the reserve we manage. We can't get EU or any other funds just to maintain it unless we do/build/make something for people too. Why can't we maintain it just for other living beings, for animals and plants, human beings excluded? Why do we have to destroy half of the habitat for the interest of people?

This morning when I drove through a village I live in, about 200 m from my home, still among the houses, I saw a fox. It didn't run away, so I slowed down. Then it slowly moved to the edge of the road and waited there. I think it won't live long if a hunter sees it. They like killing foxes as I heard. People in my village like killing cats as well. And I was present yesterday when a cat caught a sparrow. This is how it goes. I didn't intervene. Why would I? This is a natural selection. But what we, human beings do, is not a natural selection anymore. It is killing for our own interest and fun.

Until next September

I had a chance to meet most unusual person yesterday when we said farewell to our lace making teacher with a promise to meet again in September 2012. Well, who knows how many of us will be there next year. At the end of our "party" a woman joined us. She looked and acted like a man but had a voice of a woman. She has four children. I smiled at this because it made me think. She must be a strong person, covering her grief behind a smile and jokes. She made me think about my own life. I may be looking like a woman but anyway, I will never have children. And I have not chosen it to be so.

We had an especially good time because of this woman, and I am glad I had a chance to meet her. With such meetings we grow and we become stronger. Actually, each of those women at the course gave me a little bit of themselves. I hope they felt the same when I told them my stories.

Look forward

Before leaving home on Saturday I played with oracle cards. I was surprised when I pulled out this one: I smiled. Funny. The other card said: Examine the circumstances you face now and recognize which choices brought you where you are. Then say no to the negative and toxic ones.

So, I did think about what brought me here where I am at the moment. I came to one conclusion - it is about time that I start thinking positively. And yes, it is time to look forward. Although it helps a lot sometimes to look back at the happy moments in life. Sometimes, when you think that you won't be able to make another step on the path in front of you.

Tomaž

It was exactly 30 years ago when we heard a dreadful news. A plane, full of Slovenian citizens, crashed into a mountain in Corsica. One day later, a white rose was laying on one of the desks in my class. He was the cleverest guy in our class, always very quiet. His whole family went on a holiday that day, the first holiday in many, many years. They all died that day.

I don't remember if i was on his funeral but I remember visiting his grave once. And again this summer when I was coming from my hike in the mountains. It looked like as the gravestone was new but his birth year written on it was still wrong.

I wonder how many other schoolfriends ever remember him or am I the only one? After all, I drive to work almost every day through a street where he used to live. What would he be doing today if he lived?

30 years already... it's been a long time since he's gone. In my mind he is still a little boy at the age of 12, not more.

Complaining about the weather

The wind started to blow this morning, and in spite the temperature was the same as yesterday (-1 degrees C), the windshield on my car was not frozen. Hooray for the change of weather! I looked through the window this morning and realized that I haven't seen the stars for about two (or is it already three or even four?) weeks. Later, when I was drinking coffee with my colleagues, guys started to complain about the chilly and foggy weather we've been having for absolutely too long here in Ljubljana. Guys complaining over the weather? This doesn't happen often... They too are getting cold.

I left home on Thursday, and drove to the other part of Slovenia only to face another gray landscape and meet more people who complained about the fog. I had no other choice because I had to be there. I promised. I was cold most of the time, all four days in a row. The thought of going home on Sunday made me smile because I knew that it was warm there. It always is. Home sweet home, no matter how chaotic it looks like.

When we came back home Ž said that it was really nice to be in a warm and cozy place. It was good to hear that. And on Monday after work I drove up the nearby hill to see the sun after more than a week. I was getting crazy and depressed from this gray, piercing cold fog blanket over our heads.

I am glad that holidays are approaching. At least something that gives a little bit of light to everyday grayness. I don't like this time of a year, wet and damp and foggy and dark, leafless and soundless. Leafless? Well, not really. I was tripping over the rocks and roots covered by fallen leaves all the time these days...

P.s.: Those white storks on a picture above are made of socks; young girls and boys made them to raise money for their future projects.